First off, let me start by saying that this column is not supposed to be sad for the holidays, it’s supposed to be uplifting. I hope it helps.

The holidays are a tough time of year for those of us who have very few family members left, and have even lost family members this year.

When we were little kids spending our summers running through the sprinklers, then after that waiting anxiously for December, so we could finally tell Santa Claus what we wanted for Christmas, we never dreamed of a time that all of those people in our lives then, might not still be in our lives now.

My mom passed away 10 years ago, and that day is a sad day each year. But my father used to say, “Carlie, we always remember the sad dates and anniversaries better than we remember the good ones.” He said, not long before he died, that “we should do something positive to mark those sad dates, and turn them into something enjoyable! ”

It’s hard to think of anything but the sadness, and those we’ve lost, around the holidays, but I now try my damnedest to celebrate them, and focus on the most memorable times with them – which would probably mean nothing to anyone else.

One of the earliest Christmas’s and Christmas gifts I remember getting from “Santa parents” – and one of the best – was my prized Woodburning set! At a whopping eight years old, I truly thought Woodburning was going to be the career for me! Until I decided to find out what would happen if I put the woodburning pen to the green shag carpet. If you don’t already know, 1970’s era shag carpet burned – more like melted – very easily, because there is nothing natural about it. It’s basically just one big synthetic forest.

I was reminded of that for years every time I raked the shag carpeting, because there was a permanent burn mark right near the couch, where I tested my skills. Safe to say I did not become a professional wood burner – if there is even such a thing.

But the next year, when I got my Easy Bake Oven, I knew I would be a professional chef! Until the “cooking element” *lightbulb* went out, and I thought I could just replace it with any old bulb. It didn’t work, and my little tiny muffins never cooked. However, I am a pretty damn good cook – no thanks to my easy bake oven.

My “Chrissy” doll, whose hair magically grew with the push of a button – and a yank of the hair – made me think about becoming the next “Vidal Sassoon!” Until I decided to cut and style her hair. My “Chrissy” doll was now my “Chrissy with a pixie” doll, and she didn’t have much hair to magically grow.

Let’s not even talk about the ballet classes – have you seen me dance?

Those silly holiday memories , birthday memories, and various occasions are etched in my brain, just as your own are, and believe it or not – those are what help me smile around the holidays. Sometimes not as much as I would like to, but each year more than I thought I would.

So, if you feel like you need help smiling this time of year, think back to one of those earliest, smallest memories, and whoever it was that gave you those memories. Raise a glass to them, have a meal in their honor, or just smile through the tears at the the memory itself.

Cheers, and happy holidays!

Not like you need to see these, but allow me to share some pictures of  “little Carla.” Enjoy your eggnog!

-Carla Rea