Larry Martino

Weekdays 3:00pm - 8:00pm

Have you ever cited the Third Amendment to the U.S. Constitution? I haven’t. Do you know what the Third Amendment to the U.S. Constitution states? I didn’t. Well, until I watched this comedy bit from Orny Adams, I had not really given it any thought since junior high school.

The Third Amendment to the U.S. Constitution states: “No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.” Sounds like our forefathers were thinking ahead, and wanted to make sure homeowners had rights regarding who gets to stay in their house. Thankfully, this is not an amendment which many of us have had to make use of during the course of our lives.

But, that doesn’t mean we cannot cite this amendment in our every day lives! Orny Adams likes to utilize his Third Amendment rights as often as possible, as you will hear and see in the video clip below.

I love comedy. I really admire the talent of great stand-up comics. I think what they do is incredible. On the radio, I do what I do in a closed-door studio. I never see the audience. Stand-up comedians have to make people laugh while they are looking them right in the eye. It’s do or die. It takes guts, and great comedic chops.

So, I thought I would share some great stand-up comedy with you every Monday. Why? Because it’s Monday! Everyone could use a good laugh on Monday. So, here we go with our next installment. Enjoy! (There are some naughty words so parental discretion is advised.)

 

 

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Larry Martino is the long-time Afternoon Drive personality on 96.3 KKLZ. The views and opinions expressed in this blog are those of Larry Martino and not necessarily those of Beasley Media Group, LLC.

 

'My Cousin Vinny': 15 Hilarious Quotes from the Iconic Comedy

My Cousin Vinny hit theaters on March 13, 1992. While it would go on to gross a respectable $52.9 million at the box office, the comedy took on a life of its own thanks to film rentals and countless airing on cable.

The film was anchored by outstanding performances from Joe Pesci as the titular Vinny Gambini, who is called upon by his cousin Bill (Ralph Macchio) to represent him and his friend, Stan (Mitchell Whitfield), in a trial for a murder they did not commit.

My Cousin Vinny would also see standout performances from character actor Lane Smith, who played district attorney Jim Trotter III, and Fred Gwynne in his final film role before his untimely death as Judge Chamberlain Haller.

However, the breakout star of the film, without a doubt, was Marisa Tomei as Mona Lisa Vito, the girlfriend to Pesci’s Vinny. Her performance would go on to win Tomei an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress.

For fans of My Cousin Vinny, the film is endlessly quotable. In honor of its anniversary, here are 15 hilarious quotes from the iconic comedy.

  • 'Oh, yeah. You blend.'

  • 'You're in Ala-f---in'-bama. You come from New York. You killed a good ol' boy. There is no way this is not going to trial!'

  • 'It's got protein! We need protein!'

  • 'Breakfast?'

  • 'Now, Mrs. Riley...and only Mrs. Riley...'

  • 'What is a 'Yute'?'

  • 'Now I ask ya: Would you give a f--- what kind of pants the son of a b---- who shot you was wearing?'

  • 'I could use an a good ---kicking; I'll be very honest with you.'

  • 'You were serious about that?'

  • 'So, it's either wear the leather jacket, which I know you hate, or this. So, I wore this ridiculous thing for you.'

  • 'Are you sure about that five minutes?!/I've got no more use for this guy.'

  • 'You got it honey! You did it! The case cracker: Me in the shower!'

  • 'However, in 1964, the correct ignition timing would be four degrees before top-dead-center.'

  • 'My biological clock is ticking like this!/Lisa, I don't need this...'

  • 'No, the defense is wrong!'