What To Do When There’s No Square To Spare
Sometimes you just have to go, but wait – NO TOILET PAPER??? You don’t realize the horror of an empty toilet paper dispenser until it is too late. The site Lifehacker may have gotten a little too creative with their advice on what to do if you’re in a public bathroom and realize. “too late – no toilet paper!” The Mike & Carla Morning Show also talked about MLB allowing sponsors on uniforms that include CBD outlets, a Toyota recall you should know about and much more in this edition of “A Few Things We Think You Should Know!” But, back to being in the bathroom without any toilet paper
The obvious first step is to ask someone in the next stall for some. But what if that’s not an option? Well, here’s what Lifehacker.com suggests:
1. Toilet seat covers. These are your best option if they’re available. They’re sanitary and flushable, so they’re really just oddly-shaped toilet paper anyway.
2. Paper towels. If you can grab some paper towels from the sink area, you’ll have a scratchy but effective substitute. You can minimize the roughness by getting them a little damp before using.
3. Use the cardboard roll. It’ll be terribly uncomfortable and won’t do much, but it’s an option.
4. Check your pockets for paper. Things like receipts or old wrappers could work.
5. Use CASH. (???) It’ll be the most expensive bathroom visit of your life, but it’s the most common type of paper we carry around. Hopefully you’ve got a lot of ones, and not just a twenty. And it’s gross.
6. Use a water bottle as a makeshift bidet. It’s very European. Just make sure you throw away the bottle. And it’s gross.
7 Sacrifice your wardrobe. If you’re desperate, things like socks, underwear, and undershirts could get the job done. Just do not flush them. I know…
For the record, I’ve done one and two (take that any way you want) – but never, EVER the others, and I hope to never, EVER have to!
-Carla Rea
